If at first you don’t succeed

[youtube width=”480″ height=”320″]http://youtu.be/q6nfF2oPbKw[/youtube]

Going Further Than Before

She takes a step and falls.
But don’t tell her because she applauds.
She get’s up again and with a loud war cry, attempts another.

She falls again.
This continues until she decides to do a mini victory lap crawling,

Something she is an expert in.

After a few more shrills of joy she get’s up and walk’s several steps before falling.

Here is the thing, she went further than before.

Every time she gets up she has gone further than before.

She is explores her balance, each time a little bit different.

Going further than before.

How about you?

*Note: I’m no Whitman or Shakespeare but this is what was in my heart.

What if we went through life like my niece that is 1 year old?

What if we didn’t see each stumble, obstacle, and fall as a FAIL.

The words you use become the lens in which you view the world.

When I say you FAILED, how does it make you feel?

When I hear those words they conjure images of embarrassment, low self-esteem, failure, and rejection.

Now instead of failure what if we did a switch-er-roo and in it’s place we used experience.

Now how does the word EXPERIENCE make you feel?

It gives me a sense of pride, maturity, growth, strength, and a foundation on which to build.

Now we may have different feelings about these two words but I can bet failure has a less empowering feeling than does experience.

Don’t be afraid, I am not psychic. I am not spying in your brain. The reason I know this is because I have studied and and continue to study the power of words and their effects on our psyche, our motivation, and our perspective. By knowing these things I can coach my clients more effectively.

Before I go on let me clarify that I am not suggesting fooling yourself and saying everything is perfect. Be real. I am not saying that if your doctor say you have cancer you ignore it and say nothing is wrong. You could ask, how do I want to feel about cancer? What can I start doing right now that will help strengthen my immune system to help me overcome this challenge?

What has changed in the scenario above?

Nothing really. You didn’t achieve something. You still have cancer.

Scenario is the same but the way you feel about is different. Simply by changing the words you use, you can empower yourself to make more effective choices.

Let’s say you are trying to lose weight and decide you want to eat clean. But after 1 week into the program you are taking a road trip. You don’t prepare any food and on the way you get hungry. The only thing available is fast food. Eventually you stop and give in to the temptation. You eat a burger with fries and a coke.

What lens, what perspective, what words would best serve you?

Do you say, “I am a failure. I do this every time and that is why I can’t lose weight”?


Do you say, “When I get to my destination I am going to go to the grocery store and prepare the foods I want to be eating so I don’t have to make this decision again.”?

I ask again, which perspective will serve you better, will empower you to achieve the results you want?


*    Your words are the lens in which we view your experiences. Are you using words that empower you and help serve your purpose?

*    Experience vs Failure, what are you going to choose?  Thomas Edison said it best, “I didn’t fail, I just found 10,000 variation on how not to make a light bulb. I only needed to find one way to make it work”

*    Finally, embrace life with the joy and excitement of a 1 year old. Take it one step at a time – even with the bumps and bruises. Oh and occasionally letting out a scream or yell can be soothing and uplifting. Try it, I am pretty certain it will make you smile.


Your Thoughts:

What have you learned or realized about the words you are using?

Leave your comment below.



, ,



Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *